Currently Untitled

2011-04-23T15:35:00.000-07:00

I've been reading the stories of Linh Dinh and a woman whose name escapes me at the moment but probably begins with a “d” as well. Their prose is so lovely and rich and touching and it makes me want to create stories of my own.

I want to sit here in the university library cafe and make the person sitting across from me reading come to life. I want to give him the gift of fictional epiphany; or draw out a moment in his day that will explain him or give his otherwise pathetic life meaning.

He pauses momentarily to glance about him. Somehow he had the distinct feeling he was being watched . . . there was that sort of hovering, heavy air invading his space that made him feel slightly pushed at. His eyes darted about quickly: three women on laptops to the West; a girl writing to the South; another woman to the north looking suspiciously unoccupied. He watches her get up and adjust her clothing before she walks away.

Was it her?

He goes back to his reading, really only looking at the print on the page as he reassesses the air in his immediate atmosphere.

Glancing back over his right shoulder, he tells himself he's being ridiculous. Also, he thinks to himself, the person positioned South-East of me really oughta turn down his fucking music. It's a library, for fuck's sake. No one needs to have their headphones so loud that people approximately 22 feet away cannot only hear it but pin down the time signature, tempo and genre.

I fucking hate goddamn hip hop.

He returned to his reading, jotting down a few keywords as he skimmed the page: panopticon; adolescent peer orientation. He absently rubbed his left thumb against his scruffy upper lip—peer pressure.

He sat there looking completely ordinary in his thoughtless big-bird-yellow pullover fleece and Giants baseball cap. His hair was buzzed the same length all the way around; his face showed signs of having been shaved about 3 days ago. Maybe. He was a right-handed, 22-year-old child development major from Orange County—come all the way up here to escape the bros and hos and secretly mommy and daddy—just like 43% of the rest of the student population.

But why the Giants cap? Faded black, with a 4-inch by 2-inch ovular stain on the seam between the bill and the cap: this Giants cap made him comfortable.

He thoughtlessly adjusted it, quickly lifting it off of his head and replacing it exactly where it was before. There'ss nothing like a quick burst of fresh air on a slightly-sweaty head that is constantly hugged by a musty old security cap.

Really though, the hat made him feel like he could keep his thoughts in.

He looked to his left, accidentally making eye contact with the writing girl to the South.

Why is she looking at me?

His right ear started to ring—always a sure sign someone's talking about you . . . he stared blankly to to front.

How long has she been there?

I've been reading the stories of Linh Dinh and a woman whose name I still cannot remember. Their words put worlds in my head and make me want to make more. Record them so that other might glimpse into them with me. The sweet thing is the knowledge that we're all just interpretations of energy anyway. Thousands of worlds in a 4-inch by 2-inch ovular stain in the seam of a faded black Giants cap that is keeping the thoughts in the sweating head of a boy-man with bad taste in fleece pullovers.

re-inspired

2009-06-10T23:09:00.000-07:00

So! It's been too long since I've painted. Far too long. I think tomorrow after work, I'm going to replenish my paint supplies and get going! I feel the need to create something - to be busy with something that has no purpose other than getting out my emotions and just being what it is when I'm finished. So! Look for something new tomorrow! I am determined to get something done and post it. Hm, maybe I'll even do something tonight - afterall, it's cliche, but there -is- no time like the present. Actually, the present is the only moment in time that exists at all . . .

Lady

2009-05-14T20:21:00.001-07:00

Lady
Originally uploaded by julabug05

My most recent painting. I started with a magazine collage background and went from there.

In other news, I just made an Etsy account. I can't sell with it yet, as I'm between banks, but hopefully I should be selling by Friday, May 22nd. If you're interested - check it out then, this will definitely be listed, along with others on my flickr account.

I'm super super excited to get started!

xx

Seated Waiting

2009-05-14T19:14:00.001-07:00

Seated Waiting
Originally uploaded by julabug05

I've been rather bad at keeping up this blog, but I'm back, and I'll be consistent, I swear!
This piece stemmed from a lot of bottled-up emotions - I was feeling terribly alone when I created it, and I think I was trying to find some way to express that.
I began with the background - magazine clippings that appealed to me, and then I filled the rest in with acrylics. After that, I found this girl and totally reworked her, and well, this is what I got!
Enjoy :)

Time time time!

2008-09-07T11:02:00.000-07:00

I've been so incredibly busy lately with moving and starting school that I haven't been able to work in my art journal at all for the past couple of weeks. I have a free day tomorrow though, and I'm determined to do a new page, so, tomorrow it is!

Windows

2008-08-11T11:16:00.001-07:00

Windows
Originally uploaded by julabug05

Hard hard day today, thus, a new journal page! I've been rather frusturated with the upcoming dutch test, and I went to get some practice papers that I did corrected. Baaasically, they sucked. I don't think it was so much that all the grammar was wrong, so much as it just really doesn't sound sophisticated at all yet. Hopefully they're looking more for just plain correctness than, well, style. Ah, we'll see I guess.
Anyway, this page was a mixture of the different emotions in each of the four corners, and then some.
At least it was a productive day, despite the challenges. Challenges are good for the soul anyway, right?

Dream bubbles

2008-08-10T13:04:00.001-07:00

Dream bubbles
Originally uploaded by julabug05

I've been art journaling regularly, I just don't always remember to post them to this blog, but I shall try to be more diligent.
This page was kind of difficult for me to finish. Part of it, I think, is that with this new journal I have more room and I'm not used to working with so much space. I've also just been feeling a tad bit blocked. Not sure why. Anywho, I guess the best thing to do is just keep going, and it'll get there eventually, right?

Colorful World

2008-07-01T03:15:00.001-07:00

Colorful World
Originally uploaded by julabug05

I'm really really happy with this page. I started out with just the note to myself, and this was what I got.
I also just joined Blissfullly_Art_Journaling, a yahoo group, and it looks like I'm going to be getting a lot of good ideas and inspiration from them, so that'll be another way to keep experimenting with my art journal.
In the past few days I've also started working on making my own agenda for the coming school year. Probably partially to make myself believe, that yes, I will pass this Dutch test, and yes, I will finally be going to school full time again. As It says in my writing on the art journal page, I just feel like my world is so small right now. I really need something that's my own, that's separate.
I got to talk to Shannon about all of this along with some other stuff that's been on my mind and it was really nice. That's the one thing I hate about having moved here, is that family and friends are so far away. I guess I should be grateful for modern technology though, that lets us communicate so easily, especially since I'm hopeless when it comes to sending snail mail.

Campfire

2008-07-01T03:11:00.001-07:00

Campfire
Originally uploaded by julabug05

The campfire on Saturday was lot's and lot's of fun. Everyone wants to do it again this coming weekend, so I think that'll be the plan.
Haha, I realized that for all 10 years of Girl Scouts that I did, I can't make a campfire! It was slightly pitiful, but funny nonetheless. We all just had fun sitting around, watching Juno and Bert wrestle, playing soccer, talking. I may be the only girl in the group, but that gives me a different sort of position, and I kind of like it. The selfish part of me wants it to stay that way, and considering how shy these guys can be around girls, it might just stay that way for awhile, we'll see.

Garden State

2008-06-18T13:45:00.001-07:00

Garden State
Originally uploaded by julabug05

I watched the Garden State today. I hadn't seen it in a long time, and I'd forgotten how beautiful it really is. Whenever I watch it, it's like a reminder to just live, that life is in the details. I think so many people go through life with a filter - not really seeing or hearing or smelling, just kind of passing though rather than participating and experiencing. We can only be certain of this one life, of this one chance that we have right now to have experiences and feel what it is to be alive. I don't understand how people can waste that.
Actually, to be honest, I do understand it, because I did it for a long time, and I still catch myself doing it at times. It's so easy to get caught up in our minds, to constantly be thinking or remembering or analyzing or planning, but what's the point of that really? All we have, all we've ever had is this moment.

Nightdancing

2008-06-16T07:52:00.001-07:00

Nightdancing
Originally uploaded by julabug05

Nightdancing, by Elizabeth Garner was such an interesting book. The imagery she used was so fabulous that I just had to make a page after it. As a matter of fact, I think I'm going to make it a habit to make a page for every book I read. That would be especially wise for me since I have the memory of a Goldfish. I could use it both to reference to if I want to recommend a book, but also for those many times when I want to tell someone about a certain story but can't remember for the life of me the name of the book or the author :)

Almost mid-year resolutions

2008-06-16T07:49:00.001-07:00

Almost mid-year resolutions
Originally uploaded by julabug05

New year isn't the only time I'm allowed to make resolutions and changes, so I figured today would be just as good a day as any :) They are:

Take it easy and just let go.
Stop trying to define myself.
Don't not do things just because of what other people may think. (a big one for me, though I hate to admit it.)
Write, write, write!
Live in the now.
Don't be too hard on myself.
Do something creative every day.
Be more affectionate.

Getting started

2008-06-16T02:16:00.000-07:00

Welcome to my blog!
I'm not a stranger to blogging, as I've had one for the past couple of years on Xanga, but I wanted to post somewhere with a larger art community. So, here I am!
I hope for this to become a place to me to learn about myself as a writer and an artist as well as to meet others who can't live without creativity.
In the past couple of months I've gotten really interested in art journaling, so I'll be sharing some of the pages I make here. I'm also interested in trying my hand at video blogging, so, we'll see how that goes - if it works out, I'll put that on here as well. Other things I'm interested in sharing include poetry, perhaps some short stories, and whatever else I'm inspired to write.